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About Deviant clint210Female/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 14 Years
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Deja Vu
It was I Don't Know When last summer that I accidentally met Him. I was mostly in Eugene then, running away from demons I couldn't name. Every now and then I cautiously returned home (term used loosely) to make sure everyone was still alive without me.
               Adam's parents were in Mexico spreading the gospel, so Jessa and I went over for close friends and cheap wine. Driving up we passed Tom and another boy. This boy wears his long hair like a shield and his socks inside out, and plays cribbage and won't eat lettuce and is covered in cement spackles and second-hand faith. But all I saw was Tom and another boy.
We were probably officially introduced once we got to Adam's, in-between reunions and drink orders. I only remember ending up in Adam's famous loft with Him, having a massage party, proper-style, with oils and no shirts, just like old friends. I don't remember why I gave him that simple, unearned
:iconforeverhope:foreverhope 4 21
Self-Destructive Infatuation
"That special someone is the one who doesn't want to hurt your feelings but just doesn't feel that way about you, but still wants to be friends so they can torment you with stories about their infatuation with someone who:
          -doesn't appreciate them like you do
          -can't love them like you can, and even
          -takes pleasure in parading a herd of fawning "just friends" behind them, as they indulge in one self-destructive relationship after another, with no hope (at that rate!) of EVER finding true love, despite a multitude of souls eager to lavish it upon them."  --DESPAIR.COM
I read that paragraph and it still reminds me of how I loved you and you loved her and she hated us both for no good reason.  Like I was competition; even that whore beat me at your game.  But that's alright; as Mom p
:iconaverrose:averrose 1 2
AmericanHistoryX by fukenrights AmericanHistoryX :iconfukenrights:fukenrights 1 6
Mature content
cant help it :iconfukenrights:fukenrights 7 15
be my hero
I've come too far to be pushed away,
Don't leave me. Be my hero. Save the day.
My world is spinning way too fast.
Without you, I'm never going to last.
Right now my head's pounding,
I'm in a daze.
Bloody wrists, and my body aches.
The pain, I can't bare for long.
This is slow suicide.
Stop. Before I'm gone.
Enough suffering, you decide.
But you're too late to rewind.
I'm already lost, trapped in a haze.
Too thick for you to find.
Unresponsive eyes in a distant gaze,
You only have memories of these days.
:icons0nica:s0nica 1 2
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United States
It's been a very long time since I've written in here. I still get on DA sometimes but not as often as I once did. Reading through my old journal entries is surreal. It takes me back to a time and place that seems like someone else's past; not my own. However, it is mine and I'm thankful for having my Livejournal to go back to for refreshers because no matter ones memory, one forgets. I wish I wrote in there as often as I used to for I know I'll regret not placing my thoughts, emotions and happenings presently to read years from now. I hope to work on that failure.

I still don't think I've recovered from the shock of what occurred at one point in my life...a point where I was misjudged and accused of something I did not do. I wonder if I ever will. Sometimes, I think I avoid DA for that very reason : it reminds me of things best not remembered. Of people no longer here that upon their leaving, also took their misguided opinions and beliefs about me with them. I think that hurts the most. One person can think one thing and before you know it, the entire pool is tainted and unimaginably clouded and dirty.

I am not the person I once was. I've lost touch with people on here that meant something to me...that applauded my writings, of which were nothing more than letters put together in phrases to describe momentary hurts and joys in my life. Me. I recall writings of blades and blood, of sex and tears, of darkness and hopes. Of lost loves. I remember it all but that doesn't mean I want to relive it all. Rather,  I am coming back to DA with a hope to put down new letters, new phrases, new descriptions of who I am today. There is no longer blades and blood...

...but there is still everything else, albeit, convoluted and distorted, to the point that I may no longer be recognizable.

We shall see.


Add a Comment:
dmalkav Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2011
thanks for the :+fav:
parliamentFunk Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2008
Old comments are old.

clint210 Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2008
I love your disclaimer, that rocks, lol
parliamentFunk Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2008
I change it all the time. XD
hfpierson Featured By Owner Mar 10, 2006
Hi clint210! :wave: [Just a random dev leap... Weeeee] :sprint:
adorablelittlepenis Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2006   Writer
thanks for the favourite and the friendship.
lelekelley Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2005
Thanks a bunch for the watch and the fav.

U-DO Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2005
so i was browsing deviant art and saw your looks like its an ion dissonance song.
clint210 Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2005
And, Terry Goodkind happens to be one of my favorite authors. I'm reading Chainfire
right now.
U-DO Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2005
very good. im rereading the whole series continuously until he comes out with the next book.
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